February 2011


Women rule the questions in this month of love.  Take it away ladies…


Dear Answers From Men,

Last month you talked about who has had the biggest fall from grace.  I want to know who’s had the biggest public meltdown: Charlie Sheen’s recent cocaine fueled rants, Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah’s couch like a psychopath, or David Arquette groveling on Howard Stern?

Jane; San Francisco, California

Tom Cruise’s “couch surfing” incident on Oprah was eye opening and his debacle with Scientology and Brooke Shields was laughable and entertaining. Tom Cruise, you know the guy from Mission Impossible and Top Gun, is not cool anymore. He is weird. Let’s just accept it and move on. Charlie Sheen is an addict. The person that you hear quoting Allen Iverson and talking about how pointless practice actually is, is no longer in control of his own life. That is the cocaine talking. But, fortunately, Sheen is wealthy enough to take a break and rehab. Plus, he might actually win a lawsuit for breach of contract by his employers. Stranger things have happened. By far, the biggest public melt down was by David Arquette. Arquette blabbed publicly on the Howard Stern Show about his lack of a sex life with his wife, Courtney Cox. He admitted to crying after having sex with another woman after 11 years of marriage. That definitely qualifies as an epic meltdown and it is just depressing.


Dear Answers From Men,

My boyfriend’s cool and everything, but his step-brother is hotter, drives a better car, and is always really nice to me whenever I go to their apartment.  Is there any way that I can make the roommate switch?

Misty; Salt Lake City, Utah

Misty, the only reason that I am not going to slap you on sight and in public, is because you are a woman. And real men do not hit women. What you are asking me is morally wrong and completely devious. Luckily for you, I lost my morality a long time ago, so I will answer. Because you are a woman, the world is at your disposal. The safe way to pull this off takes a little more time, but ultimately everyone can walk away from this amicably. First, you drop subtle hints to the step-brother that you might be interested under different circumstances. Tell him how cool he is and how good he looks when your boyfriend is not there. If he gets flirty then you know that he may be interested. The next step is to break up with your boyfriend amicably. Wait the proper amount of time, and make your move. Or you could go the quicker route and get him drunk.


Dear Answers From Men,

Why are guys such putzes?!?!?

Kaitlyn; Dallas, Texas

Since men have bigger brains than women, maybe you just can’t comprehend how awesome we are with your inferior mind, Katy. Do you mind if I call you Katy? Blame it on us having more testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone that makes men macho. It makes loud, violent, and obnoxious. It makes us aggressive. More of the testosterone hormone is what makes us different from women and sometimes makes us act like “putzes”.


Dear Answers From Men,

I’m a divorcee with two young children finally looking to get back into the dating seen.  When do you think it’s a good time to introduce my kids to a guy I may be interested in?

Kirsten; Champaign, Illinois

Introducing your children to a guy is a very serious step in a relationship. Dating after the divorce can be difficult, but do not further complicate your situation by allowing a stranger to meet your children too soon. Children are easily confused when too many people walk in and out of their lives too often. Submitting them to the constant losses of relationships that happens when regularly, actively dating is irresponsible and selfish. Wait until a man has shown himself to be worth spending a lifetime with, and then let him meet the kids. Just so you will know, you cannot decide to spend a lifetime with someone in 6 months or less.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *