November 2011


 

Dear Answers From Men,

Now that Kim Kardashian is single again we can all speculate who she’ll date next.  Apparently she enjoys dating overrated athletes (Reggie Bush, Miles Austin, Kris Humphries), and since she’s done football and basketball I think she’ll move on to baseball.  Hockey doesn’t generate enough buzz, and for tennis Andy Roddick is already taken.  My money is on Matt Kemp of the LA Dodgers.  He had a great year this season so people don’t realize he’s been below average since 2006, he’s 6’3” and over 200 lbs, and most importantly he lives in Los Angeles.  What do you think?

Pierre; Memphis, Tennessee

Well Pierre, I like the way that you think. But, you brought up, and somehow missed one important factor, height. Each boyfriend of the hottest Kardashian sister has gotten progressively taller. She went from dating a guy that was 5’10 to 6’2 to 6’9 over the last few years. Each one has also had a lighter complexion than the last one, so here is the prediction of the year. Kim Kardashian will date Yao Ming in 2012. Yes, he is married, but there is no way any man can pass up that booty and I wouldn’t put being a mistress past someone with a sex tape.

 

 

Dear Answers From Men,

Is 9-9-9 the number of women Herman Cain has sexually harassed?

Aaron; Springfield, Missouri

Now, I’m usually not one to jump the gun, but I think that the Republican party has screwed themselves on this one. Granted, Pres. Obama has not been able to make good on most of his promises, but at least he has not sexually harassed former employees. Cain allegedly has harassed at least three women. The first one spoke publicly recently and gave a full account of what happened in 1997. The other two women supposedly fit the same profile as the one who spoke out. I do not want to accuse the best candidate for President of the Republican party of any misgivings, but where there is smoke, there is usually fire.

 

 

Dear Answers From Men,

If the Colts win the “Suck for Luck” sweepstakes what do you think they will do? Draft him and keep Peyton? Trade the pick? Draft him and cut Peyton? As a Colts fan I really don’t know what to think.

Mike; Fort Wayne, Indiana

If the Colts are smart, they will keep Peyton and have him groom Luck for his position. Peyton is one of the five best quarterbacks that ever lived. And he still has a lot to give the NFL. He probably has at least three more seasons in him, which gives Luck plenty of time to mature and secures a great QB for the next decade. Even if Peyton decides to be a jerk to Luck, he will learn a few things from being in such a close proximity with Peyton, and Luck is as close to a sure thing as there is in the NFL. There is a reason that Aaron Rodgers, Phillip Rivers, and Tom Brady have had great careers so far. They learned under Brett Favre, Drew Brees, and Drew Bledsoe. Steve Young, a Hall of Famer, learned from possibly the best quarterback in NFL history, Joe Montana. Most successful quarterbacks had a good mentor that ran the team prior to leading their franchise.

 

 

Dear Answers From Men,

Everyone jokes about the woman who gets a little too drunk at the office party and embarrasses herself. Unfortunately I was that person at our company Halloween party. Is there a way to clean up the wreckage I created, or do I ultimately have to just resign?

Adrian; Lexington, Kentucky

Adrian, we love when women write in, so tell all your hot friends to write us too. As long as you didn’t sleep with anyone at the party, your reputation is safe. If you did sleep with anyone, especially your boss, then you will be subjected to some workroom slander. The best way to approach any PR problem is head on. Tell your superiors that your behavior was not the norm for you. You had a bad break-up, and had a few too many. Most people can relate to that. If you slept with your boss, then try to work out some vacation with him the next time you’re in the closet together. Men can’t say no mid coitus.

 

If the Colts win the “Suck for Luck” sweepstakes what do you think they will do? Draft him and keep Peyton? Trade the pick? Draft him and cut Peyton? As a Colts fan I really don’t know what to think.


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