June 7, 2012
Men are easily satisfied. In general the three F’s will suffice to keep a happy man, but there are a few behaviors that almost insure that a woman will be lonely for the rest of her life. Take the words below to heart if you want to avoid being the crazy cat lady that lives at the end of the block.
1. Never be the girl that talks about themselves – Here is a little something that you might not know ladies, men are fairly self-involved. That is the reason that they wear leather pants and masturbate like caged spider monkeys. No self aware, heterosexual man would ever puts on leather pants even in the comfort of their own home, but it takes a special kind of egotistical jerk to wear them in public. All men want to talk about themselves, so let them talk. It does two things for you. It makes you seem nurturing and interested, and it makes him feel comfortable and confidant. Men are always looking for someone who will take care of them emotionally whether they know it or not. And a man believes that you care about whatever interests him then he will be more interested in you. Plus, a man that feels confidant is more attractive isn’t he ladies?
2. Never be the blow bang girl – Do you remember the girl that blew four guys from the football team in her dorm room after the big game and 10 shots? Yes, you remember her and so does everybody else at the college except for the four guys with whom she had mouth sex. Any sexual faux pas that becomes public knowledge will follow you for the rest of your dating life and limit the type of guy that you can marry. No one wants to marry the slutty girl from college. Your reputation is like B.O., no one talks about it unless it is bad. It is a sad indictment of our moral fabric, but no one blames men for having meaningless sex while women who are promiscuous are social pariahs. Though it is a double standard, it is reality. Most women that have dark sexual pasts do not get married (or at least not married to the right type of guy).
3. Never be the slutty girl that found religion – The only thing that is worse than being the skank that slept with one of every two guys from your neighborhood is being the reformed slut who has slept 300 guys but is now a born again “virgin”. There is nothing wrong with becoming a better person or choosing a different lifestyle, but rebuking sex altogether and becoming a hypocritical slut is not okay. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman who knows what she wants from men, especially if what she wants happens to be a lot of penises in and around her body. She will always be satisfied because men will put their wood in anything and as a bonus, she will make a lot of new male friends. Sluttiness has some great advantages. A woman that has regular sex has a good idea of her expectations of her lover. And, variety can help any person hone their tastes, so women that sleep with numerous different guys should hypothetically be better at choosing a mate (at least a sexually compatible mate). Plus, woman almost never have to worry about finding a guy. Jenna Jameson, the most popular porn star in the world is dating an UFC fighter. And, for the more common slut without a porn contract, there are plenty of guys that want a chance to date them. For every promiscuous woman on the Earth, there is a shy, nerdy guy that has loved her since the first day that they met in elementary school. While she was out banging every athlete, musician, and artist that said hello in high school and college, he was writing love letters to her and studying hard to get his big pay day. Men love sluts. But, the one type of female that all guys hate is the hypocritical whore who slept with everyone except them.
4. Never be the girl with all male “friends” – Let’s set the record straight right now. No man can be a platonic friend to a woman, and no man wants to date the girl with five guys on call for sex. The truth about male/female relationships is that there is almost always some sexual desire on the guys part. Men do not approach women because they look like tey could be a great friend. And most women with multiple male friends is sexually attracted to at least one of them and emotionally attached another one. The phrase “I don’t get along with women,” says at least one of three things about you. 1. It says that you are crazy and/or bitchy and women do not like you. 2. It says that you are self-involved, insecure, or mean because those are the only character traits that insures that all of your women friends will disown you. 3. Or, it says that you are high maintenance and need constant attention from various sources. None of these character flaws are attractive to the type of guy that you want to marry.
5. Never be the girl with the male best friend – In most situations where a woman’s best friend is a guy, the woman has some unreconciled feelings about her best friend and the best friend wants to sleep with the girl, but one or both of them are too shy to make a move. Occasionally, the male friend is an ex-boyfriend with whom the girl is still in love. In either situation, the woman involved needs to address her feelings for the “best friend” or she will never put the necessary work into her ensuing relationships. The best “friend” will give her “advice” about her relationship with her lover. The “advice” always sounds like “I can not believe he said that to you. You need to leave him.”
6. Never ask a guy if he is going to marry you – If a man is considering marriage with you, then you will know it. If you have to ask him if you are going to get married, then you are probably not in the right relationship. Pointing out all of your friends that are getting married does not work. Window shopping in a jewelry store is a death sentence. A guy knows that he is with the right girl within a year of dating her. If you get to year three and there has been no talk of marriage, then it may be time to leave the relationship.
7. Never Disrespect Your Man – Men can take a lot of pain in a relationship and keep their commitment and fidelity. Men can endure arguments, bad attitudes, and boring and infrequent sex from the woman that they love, but one thing that most men can not tolerate is disrespect. Never be the girl that disrespects her guy in public. And disrespect comes in many different forms. Men will leave you if you if do any of the following: berate and/or curse at him in public, make him look inept financially, make him look inadequate sexually, or challenge his manhood. Challenging a guy’s manhood is a sure way to lose him. Never call a guy a pussy or say that he is less than a man. It is hurtful and he will lose respect for you which will end the courtship. But, the most damaging display of disrespect is also one of the most overlooked forms of it. Not listening to your man is volatile and reprehensible in a relationship. Because men are usually the party with fewer spoken words in a relationship, the words that they speak carry more weight in their minds. And contrary to popular opinion, most of the questions that men ask are well thought out. So when a man makes a request of you, no matter how small it is, he expects for you to fulfill his expectations. Ignoring or dismissing his request is direct attack on his idea of how you see him and a statement to him about the strength of your relationship with him. He thinks that since he normally does not ask you for anything, and since he regularly provides you with everything that you need, then when he asks you for anything whether it be private, financial, emotional, informative, sexual, or whatever, you should comply. Your (dismissal) feels like a slight and any question that you ask will seem like a question of his integrity which ultimately feels disrespectful. I guess it turns out that guys are pretty complicated too.
8. Never Dismiss Your Man’s Emotions – Men are seldom openly emotional, so when they do open up their feelings women need to listen to them. Guys are taught to be tough and emotionless from the time that their first words form. Stoicism is rewarded in men. Men are naturally guarded with their feelings because boys that talk about anything other than girls, sports, fights, and cars are immediately ridiculed and ostracized by their friends. If a man trusts you enough to emote with you then support him fully.
9. Never Be the No Blowjob Girl – Do I really need to explain this?