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Life Lessons for Men

23 Feb

1. Do not move to China - China by far, has the most cases of angry women cutting off the penises of their men. The reasons for this type pf crime varies, but it is mostly caused by infidelity. One obvious solution to this gigantic problem is for the men to stop cheating, but the punishment here is far worse than the crime. Infidelity should not be absolved with the lost of the male sex organ. A large percentage of the men committed suicide after they find out that their penis could not be reattached or that they would be impotent for the rest of their lives even though was reattached. Some of the men died from blood loss or shock. And, in a significant number of the cases, the women drugged their partner and then castrated him. There are a lot of evil women in China.


2. Never get in a checkout line that has 3 or more women - If you want to keep your sanity, never get into a line that has 3 or more women in it. None of them will pay with cash which is still the quickest way to pay. One of them will forget their pin number or forget that their card is maxed, one will pay with a check (if you are wondering if anyone still uses those, the answer is yes), and one will call for a price check for something that saves them $.30. None of them will know that they are going to pay for the groceries that they have put in their basket until the cashier tells them the price, so each of them will fumble around in their purse for a few moments before finding their credit cards and check book. The one that pays with a check will not have a pen, and inevitably the cashiers pen will not work. Save yourself some trouble and find the line with mostly men.


3. Buy land when the market is down - Land is one of the most precious commodities that any person can own. It hardly ever devalues and the appreciation of land can be exponential if the area that the buyer chooses is being renovated by a large development corporation or the local government. When the economy suffers like it has over the last six to eight years, people tend to be extremely frugal with their finances. If the buyer is financially stable, then the perfect time to buy homes and land is in the midst of a recession. The banks and mortgage companies fight to regain their losses on foreclosed homes and willingly sell them to consumers at fractions of their worth. When the market rebounds the value of the properties too.


4. Do not ship things that are important to you - If you are trying to move something that has any sentimental value to you to another place, do not ship it. If you cannot stand the thought of that item being broken and replaced, then move it yourself regardless of how difficult it may be. People in the shipping industry do not care about your belongings and the bigger companies cannot worry about the business of the individuals. Your property does not create revenue for the shipping industry. Plus, in most big shipping warehouses, at least three separate people touch your package before it gets to its destination. If any one of these people is having a bad day or is particularly clumsy, then your package will be broken. Large moving companies take care of the large businesses that they serve and refund the worth of the package for the individual. Do not ship anything that you are not willing to lose.

Probably not the best asset to the company.

5. Asset versus liability - Unfortunately, there is very little loyalty in the world today. Everyone is seen as either an asset or a liability. We started to learn this lesson as early as grade school, in the daily kickball game at recess, when kids were allowed to pick the teams themselves. The kids that were lean and more athletic were picked first and became more popular at the school. The ones who were physically and color-schematically uncoordinated were shunned. In today’s economy, companies are quickly deciding which employees are assets and which are not producing, just like the children did then. The earnings that you made for the company last year, have no bearing on your totals in the present. So, always perform at the highest level possible at every occasion, because this last attempt to achieve something could be your last opportunity with the company.


6. Plan well - Always, expect the best outcome the best outcome in your endeavors, but plan for the worst possibility. In general, your expectations decide how prosperous you are in life. The people that strive for the best things in life acquire more than those that are content to take what is given to them. However, strong will by itself does not breed success. The few individuals who prepare more intently than the general population achieve higher than everyone else.


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