There are two types of people that play paintball regularly. Paintball enthusiasts are either brain-dead morons that failed to serve in any form of military service or gun-toting, sado-masochistic idiots. And, the line between these two kinds of people is very slim. Paintball is the most pointless activity that a person could participate in voluntarily, and only morons play paintball on a consistent basis.
First of all, any activity that can only be held at a place that is a solid hour outside of city limits in a wooded area is questionable at best. Walking into a paintball site is like walking into a good old-fashioned lynching or a mob burial. You know something is wrong the moment you get there, but you do not figure out that you have been set up until you get hit in the back of the head. Every venue for paintball is in a sparsely populated, densely woodsy field. These paintball courses are full of guys that could not serve in the army or on a police force for numerous reasons including but not limited to, being too fat, being too flat-footed, being too stupid to qualify, or just being too psychotic to trust with a gun. The other portion of guys are yokels from the NRA that come decked in full camouflaged gear, including a ski mask, padded vest, padded pants and have silencers for their semi-automatic paintball guns. But, they are all better than you at paintball, and they all want to play against you together. You will show up in a bright red sweater, and be handed a pair of goggles and the paintball gun that is basically a slingshot with a few dozen paint balls. You will stand out like a confused deer with neon lights hanging from his antlers in the middle of hunting season, and leave the course looking like you are wearing a full body tye-dye t-shirt.
In theory, paintball is a exciting competition that can be shared by friends on a lazy Saturday evening. In actuality, paintball is a forum for losers to hit each other with missiles of plastic covered paint. If I wanted to pay to be hit with random objects because I enjoy the pain, then there are a few “special” clubs in the city for that, and I imagine that they are a lot more fun.
Paying someone for this to happen to you is not fun.