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Studs: All In or All Out

13 Dec

By MJ5

The opinions of the author do not necessarily reflect the thoughts of They are the beliefs of a individual guest writer of the website.  A funny one at that …


When I was a child, one of the things I looked forward to every weekend was getting up early on Saturday morning to watch my cartoons. I was a kid who grew up on Animaniacs, Smurfs, He-Man, Voltron, Transformers, Tom and Jerry, Tail Spin, and the Tic. If you were born in the late 70’s or early 80’s, we had exponentially better cartoon programming than the crap that’s on TV now.

No matter how many cartoons came and went, my all-time favorite cartoon character was Bugs Bunny. It’s hard to believe, but Bugs Bunny has been around for over 70 years!! He has survived generations and will continue to do so.The reason I liked Bugs is because he was smaller than all his opponents he faced, less armed than Elmer Fudd, and smarter than them all! No matter what the issue, Bugs figured a way to trick to his enemies into giving up messing with him!

However, when I got older, one of my best friends ruined my impression of Bugs forever. He explained to me that Bugs Bunny was gay or at least flirted with it A LOT. Before I let my friend finish his argument we almost got into a physical fight for him talking about my childhood idol Bugs. Then, he showed it to me on the internet and he proved it without saying another word!!

Bugs was a damn cross dresser and used it every time he could!


One of the mottos I have chosen to live my life by is “Go Big or Go Home!” Basically, if you’re going to commit to something, commit to it all the way! If you’re going to commit to being a better person, better father, better anything, go all the way through with it! Don’t let anyone ever say you half-stepped something at the end. If you’re going to be a coldhearted murderer, go all the way. Be defined by the choice you made, don’t play both sides of the fence! One of the situations that my motto has struggles with is crossdressing. I have NO issue with anyone else’s lifestyle or what they like. I just want them to fully commit to their sexuality. Don’t be Bugs Bunny and switch teams just cause it benefits you at the time.

After I saw Bugs on the internet, my respect for Bugs Bunny ended immediately because Bugs was in direct clash with the motto I live by. Bugs Bunny is a cross dressing, sexually ambiguous rabbit. The only real reason you know Bugs is supposed to be a guy is because he changes when he dresses in drag and acts more ‘feminine’. Bugs plays for both teams and I had to let him go!!

I don’t watch reruns of Bugs Bunny and really hadn’t talked about him much until now (I am seeking therapy).



As a man who loves women, there is nothing that I can’t stand MORE than a damn stud! Like Bugs Bunny, studs never choose a distinct direction with their lives. They play both sides of sexuality and use that to their advantage. Somehow in 2012, they became my direct competition in trying to find low self esteemed, daddy issues women. For centuries, men had this part of the market cornered. Depending on what part of the country you live in, studs are coming up quickly and taking part of the market share. There are less and less non-confident women out there because some of them are choosing to date the studs. They want the benefit of both men and women, and studs are providing it.

Men, it’s because Studs are cheating!!

It’s about time they start playing by the rules! MAN RULES!


From now on, I believe the government should step in and require studs to follow a few rules (punishable by 30 days in jail, per occurence).


1. No Stud Should Get In Free during Women Free Before …

It is NOT FAIR for you to jump back on the other side of the fence just to be able to get in free. You are playing the MAN card, play it all the way, reach in your damn wallet, and PAY! Why should you get in free when you are there to talk to women just like the men!?!? When the club promoter used FREE ADMISSION as a marketing plan to attract women, I am sure that they didn’t envision a real life Bugs Bunny: the mustache growing, sexually ambiguous female dude. Don’t call it discrimination, just pay your $20 just like every other guy!


2. Every Stud should be permanently equipped with a strap on that I am going to invent!! This new engineered phallus is going to act and behave like a real penis and you only get ONE that’s drawn by random selecting. It will be assigned by serial number so you can’t trade it in to get a bigger one later. If men can’t change their size right now, you shouldn’t be able to go buy a bigger didlo because you decided to sleep with a chick who is too big for your current strap on. There needs to be big-dicked and small-dicked studs. I am looking forward to the day a stud gets talked about at the office for having a small penis! If men are subject to this scrutiny due to no fault of their own, small dicked studs should be made of fun, too! Just play by the same rules!


3. My re-invented strap on will also have a timer on it that randomly determines a time where the unit goes soft in the middle of sex. It’s not fair for Studs to be able to brag that they fucked a girl all night! NO SHIT, you are fucking with plastic! It never goes soft!


4. My reinvented strap on will also have a place to ensure that Studs have the ability to pee through it! There is no reason a chick should be experimenting in order to avoid a guy that pees on the toilet seat. With my new invention, women will know that a stud will too!


5. The ability to get a woman pregnant and pay child support. My new reinvented strap on will also come pre-loaded with sperm so that a woman knows she might get pregnant by a Stud too! If a stud wants to assume all the pleasures of having sex with women, they should inherit some of the risks too!


6. The freedom for a man to hit a stud for pulling your man card. I would never condone a man hitting a woman; that is completely cowardly. The ONLY exception to the rule is that men should be just as free to hit a stud as they would another man. If a stud steps on your shoe or talks to your girl in the club, they should not be able to jump on the ”Don’t hit me, I am a girl” side of the fence to avoid physical confrontation. Being a man has its risks and rewards – do not accept all the rewards without accepting some of the risks too!


I know there are a lot of men out there who absolutely love lesbians and have either had their threesome, or out there trying to get one! I am sure you do not want to invite another woman into your bed who looks and acts like you! We love women who love women who look like women!

These studs are trying to play you! If they want to act like men and get the enjoyable Kitties we do, they should have to play by the same rules!!! A bear can’t truly disguise himself as a fish to hunt fish! A lion can’t go hide as a gazelle in order to eat gazelles.  There are certain rules of nature and I believe some studs violate those rules! Studs should not be able to act like Pussies to be able to get Pussy!




One Response to “Studs: All In or All Out”

  1. Anonymous December 28, 2012 at 6:10 PM #

    Since bad boys and studs are born not made, unless you’ve always been getting tons of easy pussy while rarely spending a dime, the only self respecting option- is to (learn to) be a master player- it only matters if you want to fuck them.

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