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Reasons You Should Wait to Have Children

17 Apr

wait - responsibility

Children are the most wonderful gift that any couple could be given. They are little bundles of joy that make their parents more responsible, happier, and better people than they would have been without them. However, no person fully understands what it means to be a parent before they become one. Having children changes your life in ways unimaginable.

 

1. You will have no time – Your parents tell you that your children will take all of your time from the moment that they arrive, but you cannot totally comprehend what that means to the way that you live. From the very first day that your child is born, your child will be with you or your partner which means that you will have to factor the time it takes you to get your child ready into the time that it takes you to leave your house. For an infant, that could easily mean an extra hour between changing the baby’s diapers, getting the baby clothed, and feeding it. Once they reach school age, you will have programs and games to attend. Your children do not become self-sufficient until they are teenagers. All of your free time goes to the care of your child once you become a parent.

2. You will have no money – Kids cost money. Plain and simple. Those aforementioned programs are  financed by parents. In addition to the fundraisers and drives that you will be forced to participate in, you will have to pay for the costumes, uniforms, or nice clothing that your child has to wear. In fact, children require a large amount of clothing without extra school functions. Girls grow steadily and will need a continuous flow of clothing throughout the years. Boys grow sporadically and can completely outgrow new clothing that was purchased a month ago. If your child gets sick, you have to pay for the doctor, and they will get sick. Insurance rarely covers over 80% and you have to pay the deductible too. Your finances leave your pockets once you have children.

 

3. You will never be alone again – Raising a child is not like having a puppy. With the latter, you can stick it in a cage when you need some alone time or put it outside. Your son or daughter will be in your home, with you, until he or she is at least 18 years old. This means that you and your significant other have to schedule babysitters to regularly spend the necessary time that it takes to maintain a relationship. Your child will be attached to one of you until they get out of the house, so any extra-curricular activities have to wait until they are sleep.

 

4. You are responsible for another life – Your children are your responsibility. Parents have to know where their children are at all times, especially in the infant, toddler, and prepubescent stages. Younger kids have natural curiosity and find the most dangerous objects and chemicals with ease. Older children play roughly with each other and injure themselves and others. Kids in puberty are still difficult to guide because their changing hormones make them more likely to take risk and make poor decisions. Your life will become a vicious cycle of worrying about your children. How is this affecting them? How are they affecting others? What can you do to affect anything? Children are the leading cause in adult anxiety.

5. You decide your child’s success in life – You are responsible for guiding your child’s decisions. Every word that you say and every behavior that you show them molds their actions toward a goal and thus shapes their future. You become an example of  how to live whether you choose to or not. Their actions reflect your ability or inability to teach them sound reasoning and decent morality. Suddenly, every one of your actions affect the person that is closest to you. That is a lot of pressure for anyone.

 

6. You are selfish – Honestly, you are too self-centered to have a child. All the attention and focus of your life shifts when you have a child. You can no longer spend quality time with your partner and your sex life will be non-existent for the first few months after their birth. Think about that for a moment. No sex. You are in the prime of your canoodling years, and the baby will force you to go thrustless for months on end. Women can not see past the baby’s needs. Men can not see past the their insecurities.

Having a child transforms your lifestyle into a shell of itself. You will be worn out, penniless, sexually frustrated, and completely engulfed in the life of your little one, and so will your partner. If you can afford to wait to have children, then wait. They are the most precious gift that you will ever receive, but once they are on the way into this world, your life will never be the same.

Girls You Will Date in Your Lifetime

15 Apr

angry bitch02

By William Bixby

Before any man can settle down with the “Right” woman, he has to date a few of the wrong women first. They are all completely different and completely necessary to a man’s maturation. These women teach men lessons about both the fairer sex and about himself. They help him to grow into the man that can be a loving father and a doting husband in the future. These women are a necessary part of every man’s life.

The Innocent Girl - You met her in elementary school and you eventually ended up being high school sweethearts. She was the archetype of sweetness and innocence. You were always met with affection and adoration when you were around her. She baked cookies for you with her mom, and you were as much a part of her family as her own brother. In fact, you and her brother played ball together even when she was not around. Your parents and everyone near you thought that the two of you would get married, buy a house with the proverbial white picket fence, and have a few rosy cheeked kids. You were so in love.

Why you broke up: Either your high school sweetheart went to college and became a total slut, or you went off to college, and suddenly she seemed a bit more immature than the girls that were at your university. She called you crying about how you were neglecting her, so you did the only that you could do in that situation. You ignored her even more. Way to go Mr. Sensitive.

What she teaches you: This woman teaches you that love is not always enough for a relationship. You genuinely care about her, but as you have matured, you have also realized that love is not always sustainable.

 

The Earthy, Environmental Girl - She dresses a little bit different and is into hobbies that you have never considered trying. She likes to watch movies and listen to alternative music. She reads books about that are about socioeconomic politics and their affect on governmental policy. You did not know that those books existed before her. This young woman is cerebral and comfortable in her own skin. She shows you a few things that you never thought that you would like. But, she is also decidedly counter-culture and not into her physical appearance.

Why you broke up: You met a hotter, more high maintenance girl. Why? Because boobs, that’s why.

What she teaches you: She teaches you to keep an open mind. You learned that attraction can come in any form. The earthy woman appeals to your mind as much as she does physically. She also teaches you that you are a little shallow, and that physical attraction has some weight too.

The Girl You Hate - This woman is a real bitch. When the relationship is good it is absolutely unbelievable. The sex is mind-blowing. She knows exactly what to say to stroke your ego and how to make you feel like a man. Unfortunately, she usually completely ignores your ego and spends her time saying the exact thing that she knows will hurt your feelings or piss you off. This woman is both angry and miserable, and she will not rest until you are too. The entire relationship consists of emotional battles and make-up sex followed by bigger arguments. She is the most mentally unstable person that you know, but it takes you a year to figure that out.

Why you broke up: Seriously, she was a total bitch.

What she teaches you: Who not to date.

 

The Rock Chick - She is one tough chick and she likes good music. *She is emasculating and brutally honest, but she is also fun to be around and never goes overboard. Unfortunately, she gets tired of you and starts dating a guy with a blue mohawk.

Why you broke up: Spike, her new boy toy, could kick your ass.

What she teaches you: To grow a pair, because no woman wants to date a guy that she thinks she can beat up. Part of being a boyfriend or a husband is being a man that can lead when necessary. And, no woman will follow a man that they do not respect.

 

The Party Girl - You meet her out and go home for some good old-fashioned drunken sex. Sometimes, life is about the simple things. Sometimes she kisses her girlfriends when she has had a few drinks, sometimes they all grope you. Life is good. Your entire relationship is one club after another followed by an after party. Your days all mesh together into one big celebration of absolutely nothing. And, that is the point. She is fun.

Why you broke up: You had spent a few months together before you realized that your best times together are in a cloudy haze. And then, she started trying the hard drugs.

What she teaches you: She teaches you how to hold your liquor and what her girlfriend’s underwear looks like. And, she also shows you that even drinking, partying, and sex gets old after a while.

 

The Freaky Girl - You name it and she is willing to try it with you. She has a whip hanging over her headboard and a few toys hiding under her bed. She is into watersports, bondage, role playing, and any of the nastiest things at the tip of your imagination. She is completely open sexually and you happened to meet her at the right time. Her marriage was too constricting and her divorce was reason enough to start openly experimenting with her sexuality. Nothing is off the table with her.

Why you broke up: No sane person keeps a ball gag and a whip in their top drawer. This woman is crazy, and crazy women are by far the best in the bedroom. However, you realized that the S&M chick is usually not the one that you marry.

What she teaches you: What you like and dislike in the bedroom, and what a “hot carl” is.

The “I’m Like One Of The Guys” Girl - You probably met her in your first year of college and the two of you were just good friends. You hung out over the years and built a real friendship, and then one day, after a lot of drinks, you slept together. You can talk to her about anything including other girls. She cooks for you, occasionally does your laundry, and cleans up behind you. Strangely, she can carry the conversation by herself and cracks jokes (funny ones). If she were actually cute, you would marry her.

Why you broke up: You never were really in a real relationship with her. Things got weird after the sex, and you both vowed to just be friends.

What she teaches you: That women can actually be fun and funny outside the bedroom. You did not realize how much more there was to attraction than appearances.

 

The Daddy’s Girl - She expects you to pay for everything. It is the least that you can do to get her attention. She expects for you to pay her bills for her. She is your girl isn’t she? She does not have a job, but drives a fully loaded Benz. She lives in one of the family homes rent-free. No matter what you do for her, it is not close to enough because her father has supplied her with everything that she has ever wanted.

Why you broke up: In essence, she was married to her father.

What she teaches you: That there is little difference between a gold digger, a high maintenance woman, and an entitled princess. And, to avoid them all.

 

The Girl You Should Have Married – This woman embodies all the good traits of the women above, and does not have any the personality traits that are deal breakers for you. She may not be the most beautiful woman in the room, but she is gorgeous to you, and her personality makes her even more attractive. You laugh together, you share similar values, and you have similar goals. She comes from money, and her parents call you son. The two of you communicate well together and you trust each other. She is the perfect woman for you.

Why you broke up: The relationship staled. Nothing was necessarily wrong with her, but things became boring. Maybe you got cold feet. Maybe you slept with her best friend. Either way you knew that she was not the woman for you.

What she teaches you: Even when things seem perfect, they may not be right for you.

 

All of these women prepare you for the love of your life. To some, dating seems like an exercise in futility. They believe that there is no one out there for them, but that is not the truth. If you have not found the person who makes your days better and keeps you warm at night, then just keep looking. All your bad experiences are shaping you and readying you for the relationship that will change your life.

*First sexist statement of the year. YAY!

Guys That You Should Not Date

10 Apr

Lothario

Ladies, I’ve been giving advice to friends about dating since my teenage years and the same people make the same mistakes with seemingly the same guys. Under no circumstance do you date these men. They will not make good friends, lovers, or even associates. We will start with the most obvious choice.

 

1. The player - One woman is never enough for this fellow; he has enough love to go around. If he’s made it to 25 he also has enough kids and STD’s to go around. He is probably tall and good-looking, and he will talk to you and any other attractive girl that is around. Some players aren’t handsome, but they are financially secure and very charismatic. Regardless of his looks or bank account, he is always on the prowl. He’s an insatiable flirt around cute girls, but seems to really be into you too. A player can be difficult to figure out. Ladies, this is done purposely. When you talk to him, it’s magical. He always says the right thing and seems like he can’t wait to see or talk to you again. The intimacy is spectacular. Only, you almost never see him and he never calls. Confusing right? No, it’s actually pretty simple. He calls and spends time with someone else. He’s playing you and some other women too. It really is this transparent, if a guy likes you, he makes time for you.

2. Mr. Self-Centered - Does he take longer than you to get ready? Does he still not know your best friend’s name after a year of being around her and after vacationing with her and her boyfriend? It never seems like he’s listening, right? That’s because he’s not listening. He is too involved with himself to worry about your affairs. You just exist in a world that revolves around him. It doesn’t mean that he does not like you; it means he loves himself more than you could ever know. Unfortunately, your love for him is expendable.

“No, I can talk.”

3. The Male “Friend” - This is a myth ladies. It’s a fairy tale, like the Tooth Fairy, Big Foot, and a smart supermodel. The male friend does not exist. IT NEVER HAS; IT NEVER WILL. If he’s your friend he wants you. He’s just waiting for the right opportunity. How did you meet him? Let me guess he came up to you. Probably said, “You seem really cool/ nice/sweet/awesome/ whatever, we should hang out sometime.” When you told him that you have a boyfriend, he told you it doesn’t have to be more than a friendship, right? It is more than a friendship to him, ladies. When you have a flat, who is there with coffee and a tire iron? He isn’t. Your boyfriend is there. When your boyfriend screws up, who is the first to call? Your “friend”, saying how terrible your boyfriend treats you. Male friends are just auditioning for the role of boyfriend. He is waiting until you are the most vulnerable and broken up with your man to say, “Why don’t we give it a try?” If he’s really good, he’ll quickly follow that with, “we shouldn’t, I don’t want to mess up our friendship. You’re just so cool/nice/ sweet/awesome/whatever.”

This shows is your male friend is thinking about your friendship.

4. The Bitter Guy - His first girlfriend cheated with his best friend and all the women he has dated and will date will pay for it. He’s belligerent and mistrustful or sweet and a bigamist. The mission of the bitter guy is to avenge his ego. A liaison with him will be the worst relationship that any woman could have. His pain forces him to push you away.

 

5. Mr. Insecurity - Mr. Insecurity comes in two forms, the man obviously lacking confidence and the deceitfully insecure man. And, either man is completely undesirable.

A. The Man Nag - “Where have you been?” “Who were you with? I was worried about you.” “Are you okay?” This obviously insecure man has millions of questions for you daily; not because he is genuinely concerned about you, but because he does not want you to leave him. He has a poor self-image and can’t understand why you would want to be with him. And because of his real or perceived shortcomings, he will nag and worry you until you finally do leave and then appropriately blame himself for it.

B. The Jerk - This guy talks incessantly about your imperfections in public and private. He is outwardly the most brash, cocky, arrogant guy that you’ve met at first. His self-confidence drew you to him. But, after a few months you realize that the confidence that you saw when you first started dating was a cover for very low self-esteem. He is belligerent, belittling and just a bad person. The only way he thinks he can keep you is by lowering your confidence and self-esteem through verbal warfare.

The Cat Whisperer: How Good Are You in the Bedroom?

5 Apr

cat whisperer

Unless you have literally helped every woman that you have ever met find their way to nightly religion (Oh God, Oh God, Oh God), then you may wonder how well you stack up between the sheets against the average Joe. Well, through stringent calculated searches and great sacrifice, AnswersFromMen.com has put together the definitive way of, ahem, finding how you measure up in the bedroom against the other guys. These pointers will help you to figure out how impressive you actually are in the sack.

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1. Do You Listen to the Woman?

Here is your first hint that this article was written by someone who understands women. The first piece of advice for understanding women sexually is knowing how to listen to their emotions. In fact, your most important tool in pleasing a woman is understanding how she feels and what she wants. You will only understand a woman’s desires by shutting your mouth and paying close attention to her, so seriously, shut your mouth and listen to your lady. Most women need to connect emotionally with a man to enjoy themselves physically. If you are attentive and caring enough, you will find that most women will tell you exactly how to make them happy between the sheets. She will tell you if she likes light petting (everyone does) or a strong touch (everyone does). She will let you know if she is in the mood for gentle lovemaking, a passionate, romantic session, or rough, nasty sex. What a woman wants sexually changes from day to day, sometimes hour to hour. Listening is not as simple as laughing at the appropriate moments and nodding your head like a human bobble-head doll. Listening to a woman includes picking up her nonverbal cues as well as actively participating in the conversation that she has with you. And, the connection that the two of you make before you start having sex directly affects how good the sex actually is. Sex is not only physical, but also mental and emotional (especially for most women). If you do not listen to your woman, then you can not be a great lover.

 

2. Size Matters

Every guy wants to have a thirteen inch rooster in his pants, but only a few men actually measure up to those standards. And truthfully, though a few size queens who only want enormous penises do exist in the population, most women prefer to work with a penis that is a teensy bit smaller than a foot. The Grafenburg spot or the G-spot, a bundle of nerves that is easily stimulated, is located about three inches inside the vagina and the average penis is about six inches, so unless you have the tiniest penis in the world, you probably can give your date a little pleasure with your member. Women usually are more concerned with girth and motion than length anyway.

 

3. Approach

Your mental and emotional approach decide how well you are able to please your lover. Your mindset can not be selfish if you want to please a woman, because the best lovers get pleasure from pleasing their partners. Seeing your lady’s face and hearing her voice in the heat of passion should be enough for you. If you are good lover, then your partner should know that your goal in sex is for her to get off every time you have sex. Pick positions that she likes. Use toys. Make her fantasies come true by doing the things that she enjoys in the bedroom. But, there should be no pressure on her to finish. A lot of men are too goal-oriented when it comes to sex and that affects the quality of the experience for everyone involved. Guys are either too involved in their own pleasure or too focused on providing an orgasm to actually give their partner an orgasm. These mindsets prove to be counterproductive in the bedroom because they are based in egocentrism. Men who just want sexual release could not care less about their partner or their pleasure. Obviously, this leaves their partners unsatisfied most of the time. And, guys who are focused on giving an orgasm to their lovers for their own egos put pressure on themselves and their partners to perform. This leads to performance anxiety for both parties and no climaxes for one party. A good lover relaxes and focuses on making the experience great for his partner.

cunnilingus02

4. Foreplay

Every sexual encounter is different, but most couples have fairly predictable sex together. There is a little kissing, a little foreplay, and then the old in-and-out in most cases. If your idea of foreplay is a kiss here and a few licks there before dry-humping her until you finish, then you are either a ninth grader who should not be having sex for your own sake, or the most disappointing lover in the history of sex who should not be having sex for the sake of everyone else. Any decent partner should be aiming for a couple of orgasms for his lady every time in the preliminary rounds of sex. Up to 85% of women can not orgasm without clitoral stimulation, so foreplay is the main course for a lot of women. It should be treated as such. Good sex starts with good conversation, and then transitions into great kissing. That kissing builds into sensual touching that becomes more passionate as the night proceeds. And finally, comes attentive oral sex. A great lover listens to what his partner’s body tells him in addition to what she says. The way that a woman’s body moves relays what she wants from her partner. Her hips dictate how you should react. If she presses her hips forward, then she wants a little more pressure on her clitoris. If her hips are moving back, then the sensation may be too intense for her or painful. And, most women express themselves vocally too. If she says ”Faster,” then that probably indicates that she wants you to go faster. ”Harder” means to add a little pressure. And, if she says, Right there,” then keep doing exactly what you are doing. Being sensitive to both verbal and nonverbal cues and engaging in plenty of enthusiastic foreplay shows that you are a receptive and satisfying sex partner.

 

5.Technique

Any man that makes magic happen between the sheets knows that there is no exact code to giving a woman pleasure. Each woman is different, and as mentioned before, what a woman wants at any particular point in time can change depending on various situational circumstances or for no reason at all. So, there are only three rules that apply to most sexual situations and technique with women. Take your time with her. Explore her body. Build momentum and intensity.

If you are the type of man that rushes through sex every time you sleep with a woman, then you have probably never given a woman an orgasm in your life. Though a quickie hits the spot sometimes, most situations call for a little less hammering and a lot more stroking. Women generally take more time, effort, and attention to climax. You have to read your partner’s non-verbal cues in order to please her. Most women need passionate kissing to connect, but some women do not like to kiss. Take your time and find what she likes and dislikes with her partner. Physical contact is obviously necessary in sex, but most guys keep all intimate acts focused on genital to genital stimulation. The entirety of a woman’s body becomes an erogenous zone when she is stimulated, so use her tactile senses to incite her passion. Build sexual tension by caressing her slowly and intently. Move your hands and your mouth to titillate her. Often ignored body parts like the inside of elbows, the backs of knees, armpits, and the feet hide bundles of nerves. Stimulate them as you explore each other’s bodies. Most men rush to get to penetration here, but a good lover makes her wait. Connecting through touching builds the intensity of sex when it actually does occur.

Once it finally is time for some coed mattress dancing, a good lover has the same level of attentiveness with his partner despite the opportunity for more personal pleasure. A lot of men think that it is their turn to get off once their penis enters a vagina. They start pounding away at the woman until they finish. This is a mistake. Sex requires as much finesse as it does raw aggression. Moving your hips to stroke in several directions and keeping a good rhythm help to increase the chance that you stimulate her G-spot and creates more sensation altogether for both of you. Size does not matter as much as technique and enthusiasm. As long as you use the few inches that you have well, then most women will enjoy sex with you. And, if you do have the smallest penis in the world your fingers and tongue will help you immensely with the ladies. Change pace and positions unless she is close to orgasm. Use your body bring her pleasure. A man who knows how to move knows how to please women.

 

As a lover, you have to read the situation every time you enter the bedroom. Sometimes the hottest sex is a quickie before a night out, but most of the time the night demands a slow, sultry encounter. How good you are in bed depends on your ability to guess your partner’s needs and desires, how well you listen and communicate, how purposeful you are about foreplay, and how well you read her body.