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Why You Keep Meeting Crazy Women

15 Oct

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By William Bixby

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Every man has dated at least one crazy girl who led him on an emotional roller coaster ride that nearly took his sanity. And, the same is true for you. You may not know where you met her, and you can not figure out how or why you got into a relationship with her, but you dated her for three months, and she turned your life upside-down. This woman personified inconsistency and instability. She professed how much she loved you one minute, and could not stand the sight of you the next. The good days were full of wild, exciting moments and great sex because she was willing to do almost anything to have a little fun. She got you to do things that you never imagined doing too, and you realized that you loved doing them. In fact, you may have even loved her back. But, on her bad days she was as abusive as a drunk stepfather. She called you four-letter words that you did not know existed and challenged your manhood, integrity, and dignity. When you were with her, you often wondered what was wrong with her and what was wrong with you. And then, you finally realized that she was crazy and wrecking your life. You dumped her and your life immediately became less complicated. Getting out of that relationship was the best thing that you could have done. But, many men step into the same relationship with crazy women over and over again. They enter relationships with Psycho Tina, Klepto- Karen and Harriet the Stalker continuously. This article explains why men repeatedly date crazy women.

You Want to Be A Hero

Some men need to fix someone else in order for them to feel important. Call it codependency. Call it the good Samaritan complex. But, see it for what it is too. These men rescue women from all types of drama because they need to feel like “the man.” A woman’s ability to support herself usually gives some insight into her stability – or instability as the case may be – but the heroes swoop in, pay bills, and buy clothes at the first sign of trouble so they never get to see if the woman can take care of herself. The hero is more concerned with his status as savior than he is worried about actually helping the woman. But, heroes do not only exist financially. No, there are emotional heroes too. These men look for women that have been hurt and befriend them trying to prove that all men are not bad. They get these women to trust them, and begin romantic relationships with them while attempting to correct the mistakes of men before them. And then, once they have decided that the woman is incapable of having a healthy relationship, they end those relationships thus confirming the woman’s suspicions about men being untrustworthy and perpetuating the cycle. If you are a hero, then the first step to recovery understanding that women do not need saving. If a woman is constantly struggling financially, then that is because she failed budget her money. Similarly, when women are hurt over and over again by men, that means that they are consciously or unconsciously seeking out the type of men that hurt them. Their crises are not your crises.

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You Are A Drama King

Some men date crazy women because they are crazy themselves. Maybe their father neglected them when they needed him, maybe their mother abused them, or maybe they just grew up in an unstable environment, but some men need to be in the spotlight (usually negative). And, the quickest way to grab the attention of every soul in the room is to fight loudly and obnoxiously with your girlfriend in a confined area.These men date crazy women because that is all that they know how to do.They create drama in any place that they go and are only attracted to women who specialize in making a scene. So if you are constantly meeting crazy women, there is real possibility that you are crazy. You need to reevaluate who you are and why these women are attractive to you. Anger issues are usually the most prominent behavioral maladies in drama kings. So seek counseling or at least find a viable option for disclosing your emotions if you want to stop the madness. Find a better solution to disagreements than yelling at a crazy woman in public.

The Sex

Crazy women have crazy sex. She might give you a footjob at the dinner table or she might blow you in the car. She might bang you behind the dumpster at Wendy’s or ask her hot friend to join the two of you in the bedroom. Sex is an adventure with her every time. No place is off limits and no act is unfeasible. Butt sex is not only possible, it is probable. Men who date crazy stay in the relationship much longer than they intended to stay because of the sex. Yes, she might slash your tires or beat you with a tire iron, but she will also engage you in the hottest intercourse of your life. However, unstable women make life unbearable. When they are not screwing you, they are screwing up your life. The answer to all of life’s mysteries do not reside in a crazy woman’s vagina, so stop sleeping with her immediately. Her power sits between her legs, and once your brain receives its normal allotment of blood, you will realize how bat-shit insane she really is.

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This kind of sex has kept a lot of men in bad relationships.

You Are A Control Freak

People come with many different types of personalities, and men possess and display the gamut of character traits in terms of how they behave. Some men are Type A personalities and want to decide their own fate in every endeavor, and some men would honestly rather have someone else choose for them. These men unconsciously pick their partners on how often they dictate what happens in the relationship. And, there is no woman that is more crazy or more willing to dominate a romance than an anxiety-ridden, perfectionist control freak. She will take you on shopping trips and allow you to hold her purse while she plays dress-up. She will ask your opinion on several issues with no intention to follow your advice. She replaces your mother as the boss of your personal life, and you hate her for it. But, inevitably you stay with her because you have grown accustomed to being bossed around. If you keep meeting a woman who will not “let you be a man,” then maybe you are not being a man. First, you should leave the woman that you are with currently. She is accustomed to you being a pushover, and you might not have the mettle to stand up to her. Next, you need to be more assertive in your everyday musings.

 

 


Best Teams in NBA History

12 Oct

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10. 1992-93 Chicago Bulls - This team showcased Michael Jordan in his prime. He was unstoppable throughout his career, however the 92 Bulls was one of the most complete teams that was ever assembled. This Bulls team had 3 pure shooters, B.J. Armstrong, John Paxson, and Craig Hodges. The best teammate in NBA history accompanied Jordan. Scottie Pippen did whatever Jordan did not do on any given play, and he was bigger and slightly more athletic than Jordan though not as skilled. Horace Grant gave the Bulls tough points in the paint and could step out and hit jumpers.

Record: 67-15

 

9. 1966-67 Philadelphia 76′ers - This is one of Wilt Chamberlain’s few wins against the Bill Russel led Celtics. He took All-Stars Chet Walker and Billy Cunningham, and fellow Hall of Famer Hal Greer to the NBA championship in 1967. They started their season 43-4 and beat the Celtics 4-2 in one of the classic showdowns in NBA history.

Record: 68-13

 

8. 1971-72 Los Angeles Lakers - The 1972 Lakers posted the best road winning percentage in NBA history at a staggering 81.6% with a record of 31-7. An older Wilt Chamberlain joined two other Hall of Fame players, Gail Goodrich and Jerry West, and All-Stars Jim McMillian and Happy Hairston to form one of the most formidable collections of talent in the NBA’s history. The Los Angeles won 33 consecutive games in the 1971-72 season, a record that still stands today. They defeated the Knicks 4-1 to win the championship.

Record: 69-13

 

7. 1988-89 Detroit Pistons - Isaiah Thomas, Joe Dumars, Dennis Rodman, Bill Laimbeer, Jon Salley, Vinnie Johnson made up the Bad Boys. The were the toughest set of basketball players in the NBA during the late 80′s. The Bad Boys were responsible for the Jordan rules which amounted to a no lay-up rule for any of the Chicago Bulls (but Jordan, in particular received some of the hardest fouls on every trek to the basket). They were one of the first teams in the NBA that collectively would regularly foul a player than give up an easy basket. These Pistons were the first team to win consecutive championships since the Lakers teams of the earlier 80′s.

Record: 63-19

 

6. 1982-83 Philadelphia 76′ers - Hall of Fame players Julius Erving, Moses Malone, and Bobby Jones combined with All-Stars Maurice Cheeks and Andrew Toney to complete one of the most dominant teams in NBA playoff history. They posted the highest winning percentage in NBA playoffs history at 92.3% and a record of 12-1. NBA MVP Moses Malone famously proclaimed their dominance with the a projection of “Fo’, fo’, fo’!”, meaning that Philly would sweep each round of the playoffs in four games. He was not far off with his prediction.

Record: 65-17

5. 2000-01 Los Angeles Lakers - Shaquille O’Neal, Kobe Bryant – The most dominant force that the league has seen in the common era of basketball, and the 2nd best shooting guard to ever play the game teamed to make one of the best teams in NBA history. Shaquille O’neal anchored the Lakers offense and defense. They ran the offense through him and funneled opposing players to him on defense. Shaq was always among the leaders in scoring, field goal percentage, rebounds, and blocks. Kobe was a young, burgeoning talent in the early 2000′s and he could shoot without a conscience because he knew that Shaq could clean up whatever he missed. They were the perfect teammates on the floor.

Record: 56-26

 

4. 1985-86 Boston Celtics - Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, Robert Parrish – Larry Bird was one of the best shooters and most efficient players to ever play in the NBA. He shot three pointers, slashed to the rim, and rebounded and passed the ball. Bird had a complete game, and he seemed to hit every big shot that he took regardless of what the defense did. McHale was considered by many to have the best footwork ever, and he relished the big moments in the playoffs next to Bird. They formed one of the best inside-outside combinations in league history. Then, the Celtics added one of the most consistent centers to ever play in the NBA, Robert Parrish. Throw in Hall of Fame players Dennis Johnson, Bill Walton, and John Havlicek and you have a complete team of talented players who loved to compete.

Record: 67-15

 

3. 1962 Boston Celtics - With Bill Russell, Bob Cousy, Sam Jones, K.C. Jones, and Tom Heinson, the Celtics boasted five Hall of Fame players. They had the most decorated winner and possibly the best defender in league history in Bill Russell. He was the reason that the “goal tending” call was invented. The Celtics had the first premier ball-handler and passer in Cousy, and two of the best swings in basketball with K.C. and Sam Jones. They dominated the 60′s winning most of the championships during that era. Every Celtic of the 60′s has multiple rings. And Russell has 11, the most rings of any athlete who played in any of the major sports.

Record: 60-20

 

2. 1986-87 Los Angeles Lakers - Magic Johnson, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, James Worthy formed one of the best trios that ever played in the NBA. The Lakers had the best facilitator ever, the most prolific scorer in NBA history, and one of the most clutch playoff performers in NBA history together on the same team. These three formed a dynasty during the 80′s and won 5 championships as a team. Magic could score in the post or control the offense from the perimeter. However, he excelled in the open court where he brought Showtime to the national conscience. Kareem scored whenever he touched the basketball even in his old age. And, Worthy was one of the more explosive and versatile big men in the league. He was one of the first bigs to run and fill lanes once the fastbreak had started. The Lakers were a unique and gifted collection of talent.

Record: 65-17

1. 1995-96 Chicago Bulls - Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman were unstoppable together. Chicago combined possibly the best player to ever play the game of basketball with two of the best teammates in the history of basketball. Pippen is the most versatile player ever, offensively and defensively. And, Rodman is possibly the best rebounder ever. His rebounding rate blows all competitors out of the water when era is considered. And, neither Pippen or Rodman needed shots to dominate a game. Defensively, this team was stellar. The Bulls of 96 boasted two Defensive Player of the Year winners, Jordan and Rodman. But, Rodman won the award twice and Pippen was possibly a better defender than both of them. The team had great role players in sharpshooter Steve Kerr, European superstar Toni Kukoc, and former All-Stars Ron Harper and John Salley. The Chicago Bulls were almost unbeatable in 1996, and they defeated the Seattle Supersonics in 6 games to win yet another World championship.

Record: 72-10 (Then the Bulls had a 69-13 record the following year)


10 Reasons Why Being Italian Is Great

11 Oct

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1. Olive Skin – We may not all be handsome and tall, but we do not have to worry about that dark part. Italians generally have the features that all the ladies love, dark hair, tanned skin, and bedroom eyes. We were made for romance.

 

2. The Language – Italian is a language of love for a reason. It is soft and flowing. The letters roll off the tongue fluidly and easily, anything sounds great in our language. “I mangiare cacca verde.” That’s ‘I eat green shit,’ in Italian. It is a terrible thing to say, but it sounds lovely in the old language. You know it’s true.

 

3. Stay at Home – Italians love and respect family, even if we can not stand our family members. Men and women stay close to their family through their twenties regardless of where they live, and there are no stigmas attached to Italian men or women who never leave the nest. In fact, in some families, the kids are expected to stay at home until they are married. No bills and home cooking are hard to give up.

 

4. Home Cooking – You have to go out to get good Italian, and we stay in. Italian men and women are judged by their ability to throw together a good dish. You know those meatballs that you love from the store around the corner? My grandmother makes those every Thursday. Spaghetti, linguini, fettuccine? Forget about it. My father makes the pasta from scratch on his days off. I will not get started on my mother. Italians know how to cook.

5. The Ladies – Per capita, Italian women have the biggest breasts in the world. Bigger than American women. Bigger than Swedish women. Bigger than English women. That’s right Italian women are stacked. The average cup size of an Italian woman is a D cup. And, do not forget about that beautiful olive skin.

 

6. We Got An Answer to Any Question – “You want to know why? Cuz screw you, that’s why.”

 

7. The Mob – Every Italian in the world is connected to the mob in some way. Okay, that’s a lie, but we will tell you that we are connected. And you know what, you will believe us. You want to know why? Cuz screw you, that’s why.

 

8. Art – Almost every one of the most important artists in art history is Italian. We have a rich artistic history. The standouts in classic painting, sculpture, and opera are Italian. Think about Michelangelo’s David or the deep, bellowing voice of Luciano Pavarotti. Italians set the standards in art.

9. Just Visit – When you get some time and a little money saved up, visit the Italian countryside. It is one of the most historic and beautiful sights that you will ever lay your eyes on. Rustic buildings and classic architectural design litter the quaintly cobbled streets. There are gondolas, street vendors, and cozy places to dine everywhere. There is no place in the world like Italy.

 

10. Italians Make the Best Lovers – It is true, we Italians are a passionate people. You haven’t made love until you have made love to an Italian. You want to know why? Cuz screw you, that’s why.


Who’s Better, Shaq or Kobe?

10 Oct

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The NBA careers of Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant are going to be forever intertwined in the minds of basketball fans and sports media. They built a dynasty together in Los Angeles, publicly feuded before a nasty break-up, and then resurrected their careers with separate supporting casts. But who is the better basketball player in the course of history? Is it the dynamic, high scoring guard or the immovable, power dunking big man? Is it the guy who broke ankles or the one who broke backboard support systems? Only through the careful dissection of their statistics, their accomplishments in the league, and their impact on the game can an answer be found.

2001 NBA Finals - Game 2: Philadelphia 76ers vs. Los Angeles Lakers

Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant complemented each other perfectly on the basketball court, but were less than complementary off of it. The combination of an elite scoring guard and a dominant post proved to be too much for the league in the early 2000′s. They led the Los Angeles Lakers to the playoffs in every year of their partnership and won three consecutive championships in four trips to the NBA Finals. However, the Lakers stars fought publicly and constantly struggled and competed to be seen as the centerpiece of the Lakers’ dynasty in the media. Shaq was the most important player in the franchise during his tenure in LA, and he carried his teammates, including Kobe to those championships. But, the Lakers chose to keep the younger Bryant rather than resigning Shaq. At first, it seemed like a bad decision to deal Shaquille O’Neal as he had a MVP caliber season and then won a fourth NBA championship with Dwayne Wade. But, Kobe put up the highest scoring year of anyone since Michael Jordan and scored the second highest total in NBA history in a single game with 82 points against the Toronto Raptors. Though the Lakers failed to make the playoffs in Bryant’s first year by himself, he showed the immense talent that prompted the Los Angeles Lakers to choose him as the player of their immediate future. Once the franchise procured more talent, Kobe’s Lakers won two more rings.

There is great difficulty in deciphering which player has had the most distinguished career. Shaq finished among the all-time leaders in points, rebounds, field goal percentage, and blocks. Kobe Bryant has recently surpassed Shaquille O’Neal on the all-time scoring list and now sits in the 5th slot with  total points. Kobe has one NBA MVP, two Finals MVP’s, and 14 All-Star appearances with 4 All-Star MVP’s in 15 seasons in the NBA. He is a two-time scoring champ with 11 All-Defensive team selections. Kobe has career averages of 25.3 points, 5.3 rebounds, and 4.7 assists per game. Shaq averaged 23.7 points, 10.9 rebounds, 2.3 blocks, and 2.5 assists per game in his career. He was a 15-time All-Star winning 3 All-Star MVP’s. He won a regular season MVP, though it seems ridiculous that he has only one despite being the most dominant player in the league in excess of 12 years. He won four NBA titles in five trips to the NBA Finals. The first distinction between their careers is the rings. Kobe has five rings  to Shaq’s four. They won three consecutive titles together with the Lakers in the early 2000′s and dominated the National Basketball Association as the league’s best one-two punch. But, each had success after they parted ways too. Shaquille O’Neal should have won his second Most Valuable Player Award in the first year that he left Los Angeles. He instantly made the Miami Heat a contender with averages of twenty points and ten rebounds while bringing along then burgeoning star, Dwayne Wade. In his second year away from LA he managed his 4th NBA championship title with the Miami Heat. Though Kobe won two more rings without Shaq, he struggled in the first few years without him. The Lakers failed to reach the playoffs in the first season without Shaq, despite Kobe putting up the highest scoring output of his career, 35 points per game. Once Pau Gasol joined the team, Bryant won his fourth and fifth title.

But, these two Hall of Fame careers can not simply be measured in statistics. The way that they played the game and the entire scope of their historical impact on the game of basketball is the only way to differentiate between the careers of Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O’Neal. Kobe will enter the history books as the second best shooting guard to ever play the game behind only Michael Jordan. He has the second highest total points, the second most championship rings, and hit some of the biggest shots of any shooting guard in NBA history. Bryant had a stretch of 5+ years where he was easily the best and most prolific scorer in the league. He could score from anywhere on the court and seemed to always deliver in the clutch. Kobe’s strength of scoring versatility was the only real knock on Shaquille O’Neal’s game. He only scored from one place on the court, deep in the paint. However, no one could stop Shaq from getting position and then scoring against them. And that is the legacy of Shaq. No one could stop Shaq when he wanted to score. Shaq was a devastating force under the rim that intimidated opponents on the basketball court. He dunked on other teams so ferociously that eventually players just conceded points or hacked him mercilessly. Shaq was so dominant from 2000-2004 that the National Basketball Association allowed teams to play zone defenses in an attempt to slow the dreaded triangle offense that featured O’Neal in the post. Shaq brought three different franchises to the NBA Finals. All three teams, Orlando, Los Angeles, and Miami, had a promising star that reached All-Star level next to him. Penny Hardaway, Kobe Bryant, and Dwayne Wade, respectively all flourished next to Shaq. And all three of their careers middled after he left their teams. Many people thought that the reason that Kobe was so good in LA was because he was next to Shaq who rebounded and dunked any careening missed shot. Though Kobe is the second best shooting guard behind the best basketball player that ever lived and Shaq is probably only the fourth or fifth best center in NBA history, Shaq was the better of the two All-Stars. Shaq made Kobe better by being a security blanket on every play when they were teammates. Shaq cleaned up Kobe’s misses and made life on the perimeter easier for him too. He was always available for a quick dump pass to the post and commanded a double-team on every play so Kobe could never be doubled. Yes, Kobe assisted on many of Shaq’s buckets so there was a symbiotic relationship, but O’Neal was always the first and the best option when the Lakers needed a score.

Kobe is a great player and one of the best in the annals of the professional basketball, however Shaq was better through the course of history. He was more dominant, he brought three separate teammates to All-Star level, and he was the best player on teams that included Kobe. Kobe Bryant is a hell of a basketball player, but Shaquille O’Neal was better.